Dear Jared,
In your last letter, you asked a question that I have been turning over in my mind: “What is a more faithful witness to Jesus, being “right” or being “with” - even and especially so with those whom we do not agree?”
I will be the first to admit that I like being right. My husband will corroborate that statement. However, one of the reasons I appreciate our Wesleyan heritage, one of the reasons I became a United Methodist in the first place, is the fact that our theological distinctives challenge me to prioritize being with. To me, it’s a matter of holiness.
My first experience with a United Methodist Church was with a diverse and eclectic body called Reconciliation UMC. It was a church that was intentionally created to bring together multiple races and cultures into one worshipping community. It was team-led by a White pastor, an African American pastor, and a Latino pastor, and the community reflected the leadership, as did the worship style. We prayed in English and Spanish. We sang Charles Wesley hymns and spirituals from the black church tradition, one after another. We celebrated Holy Communion every week and the kids danced in the aisles to “Santo, Santo, Santo” as we sang the Great Thanksgiving in Spanish and English. It was glorious. Everything I thought I knew about the “right” way to do worship was tossed out the window when I experienced the Holy Spirit move in such a powerful way in that community. Being right was irrelevant. Being with was life itself.
Up to that point, I was under the impression (thanks to wider cultural narratives about “Christian living”) that Being Right was being holy. Making the right choices. Doing the right things. Rejecting the bad things. Holiness was a long list of do’s and don’ts, and the more closely you followed the list, the more holy you became. Holiness was about morals.
My foray into United Methodism challenged me to re-define holiness altogether. Being right became irrelevant. Being with became everything.
Let me explain.
In your first letter, you outlined 5 key distinctive ways of living as a United Methodist Christian: Grace, Holiness, Connection, Wholeheartedness, and Service. In our last two letters, we have talked about grace and, while there is much left to say on the topic, I’m going to shift our attention to distinctive #2, holiness.
Holiness is one of those churchy words that conjures up memories and beliefs and reactions in just about anybody who has experienced church. For people in my circles, holiness is usually an uncomfortable concept. It makes folks think of the stereotypical Christians who are as zealous for rules as they are resentful of rule-breakers, those who staunchly and proudly promote a Footloose approach to religion.
This was my personal view of holiness in my pre-seminary days; holiness was something to be earned and yet was something to be wary of, something heavy and impossible and hard to carry, something that didn’t quite seem to fit my understanding of Jesus and what he asks of us. That is, this was the case until I read Shane Claiborne’s Irresistible Revolution in college, and was forever changed by his description of salvation. For Claiborne, it wasn’t only about being saved from something (our sins), it was about being saved for something. For a purpose, for a life of goodness and kindness and courageous love. He put into words the thoughts of my heart - there was more to the Christian life than a list of do’s and don’ts. There was something to live for, something to reach for, something to hope for.
It was John Wesley who finally helped me to name this something as holiness. For among the many ways Wesley defined holiness, or sanctification, was to describe it as salvation from the power of sin over us, not just from its eternal consequences. Grace forgives our past wrongs and it heals our broken nature over time, so that we are no longer beholden to the broken ways of the world. Freed from the power of sin over us, holiness allows us to live in a whole new way. Or better yet, as entirely new people. As reflections of Christ himself.
John Wesley defined holiness as:
“The life of God in the [human] soul, a participation of the divine nature, the mind that was in Christ, or the renewal of our heart after the image of [God who] created us.”1
For us United Methodists, holiness is understood to be the process whereby the Holy Spirit shapes us into reflections of Jesus, equipped and empowered to carry on Jesus’ ministry in the world.
So holiness is not about being right, abiding by a code of (church-defined) morals, so much as it is about being with, abiding in Christ as Christ’s Spirit abides in us, transforming us into the reflections of God we were created to be.
I love how Jack Bernard put it in his little, yet powerful, book How to Become a Saint:
“We Christians have been accustomed to consider holiness as synonymous with morality and virtue - “being good.” Holiness is a different concept altogether. Holiness is not about doing things right, or even about being good. Holiness is entirely relational. God calls us into relationship with himself. Holiness, on our part, is nothing more, or less, than a wholehearted YES to that relationship.”2
If saying yes to a relationship with God is the heart of holiness, then being with God is its heartbeat. And there’s no way to be with God without being with God’s people, loving our neighbors as ourselves.
I wasn’t entirely truthful earlier when I said that my first United Methodist Church experience was with Reconciliation UMC. True, that was my first worship experience with a United Methodist Church, but my first true experience with United Methodists was when I was invited to a study at the Wesley Foundation in college. We were studying Richard Foster’s The Celebration of Discipline, a deep dive into practices of holiness in itself, but I have to admit, I remember nothing about the conversation we shared. It’s not that it didn’t impress me or mean something to me, it’s just that another component of our time together meant something more. You see, one of the college students attending our group made a commitment to all of us. To live out God’s command to love his neighbors, he explained, he promised to bring a homemade cheesecake to every gathering.
Homemade cheesecake. Every week. You better believe I never missed a session. More than that, I started to think of United Methodists as people who comprehended and lived out love in a whole different kind of way. People who prioritized being with, who went to great lengths to make the experience of community gatherings enjoyable and memorable - not to boost numbers or to impress outsiders, but because the John Wesley they kept mentioning taught them that being holy meant becoming like Jesus.
And Jesus sure did love a party. In fact, it’s what the “holy” ruler-follower Pharisees of the day (ahem, those who wanted to be right) most resented about Jesus. He prioritized being with - being with the outcasts and the sinners and the tax collectors and the poor and the accused. He prioritized loving his neighbor above all else, being with them in enjoyable celebrations of community. I bet he would’ve loved homemade cheesecake, too, if it had been a thing in the first century.
Jared, I know this letter only scratches the surface of all that can be said about pursuing holiness as a United Methodist. I’m sure you’ll have a lot to add to the conversation, which I hope will inspire me to put more language to my thoughts on the matter. But for now, I’ll leave you and our readers with a thought and a question.
Jesus defined and redefined holiness over and against the religious powers of his day, again and again challenging us to use love as our measure of holiness. Loving God and loving our neighbor, being with God and being with one another. John Wesley did the same, defining and redefining holiness as being with God and being with our neighbors, especially our more vulnerable neighbors. Why? Because that’s what Jesus did, and that’s what people do when they are becoming more like Christ.
So, my question: how might we United Methodists define and redefine holiness over and against the prevalent messaging of our day, over and against the religious powers that insist we must be right at all costs? What witness are we United Methodists uniquely positioned to offer, with our Wesleyan heritage of holiness? Might our understanding of holiness even offer a compelling invitation into the faith?
After all, we’re not just saved from sin and evil, we are saved for a life of love, where homemade cheesecake abounds.
Your friend, who is growing in holiness like the rest of us,
Laura
From Wesley’s Journals and Sermons, as quoted by Randy Maddox in Responsible Grace, page 178
Jack Bernard, How to Become a Saint: A Beginner’s Guide, page 30